2010 Review

This seems a suitable time to, think back on the year 2010.

Its been, quite a road. Life rocks, dude. This year means so much to me, for some reason. It seems like a typical teenage year on the books, but really though, its been extremely memorable. It was the year that totally shaped me into who I am. Who I am right now, was a result of what I've did in 2010. All the crap I've done, I don't regret a single thing.

Well, the year started off extremely carefreely, I just got over some girl, who I now refer to with my friends as bimbo. Please don't read my blog, dear bimbo. But whatever. There wasn't really anything in it anyway, we barely talked. Thinking back I really think, how could I spend days stalking a singl... uh, let's skip that part.

So, after sitting with Haolun somewhere around March, I started to meet this bunch of really cool and fun guys, each with their unique personality. This group of people currently referred to, by some people, Cliquinity. Well, I suppose the sitting arrangement was the part where I actually got to know them, afterall you gotta admit, Haolun was the guy to hang out with. I won't say the word, I won't, Popular. Whoops, there you go. Lol. Nah, seriously though. My social life sort of took a turn once I became good friends with them group. More rebellious (sorta), more fun, I wasn't the moral guy I once used to be. I didn't stick to my word as much, I didn't seem to care.

Life then was all about fitting in, doing what my friends do. Sleeping in class, hitting on girls (Uh yeah, I didn't do that part. I just sat back and watched the rest, I swear.), hanging out at Benedict's house after school, beating each other at ping pong, rapping to songs trying to impress others. Basically I didn't give much shit to studies.

Around the early part of the year, there was this girl I really fancied. I won't hide it, I went crazy over her. Day and night, everything. All my focus was on how I should approach her the next day,topics I could pick up with her. Though it might sound creepy, I spent days daydreaming about how we would be and romantic shit like that. Yeah, I always barely get away with it when teachers asked what I was thinking.

Well, finally I grew some balls and asked her out. In a.. dramatic way. Around half way through the year. I may have actually pretended my life was a movie and did all that shit that I did, and thinking back it might actually make a good storybook. But that wasn't the point. She wasn't interested and I got rejected flat. It took days and days, heartbreaking shit at home. I was rotting. It was also the period I found out my phone was bullshite.

It took, plenty of months for me moaning and groaning about how useless I was, before I finally balled up and said, this is enough for me. I've spent a quarter of a year wasting my time on something I did not achieve, and thinking that love was all I needed. No, of course it wasn't. I'm young, there's plenty ahead of me. Even though the thought of me being a good boyfriend was still lingering at the back of my head. It wasn't what I needed, it was an important year for my studies and I know it.

Around early 2010 I was also actively talking to my now "Guru" Jiayu. She was the influence, the sole influence, well maybe a bit of the awesome Vanessa. She is the reason for me staying up, now. I remember there was this point she was addicted to Lady Gaga like mad, so I stayed up with her and waited for the Alejandro video to come out. At the time it was around 1 or 2. And I slept that late. Since then, I've been sleeping later and later. I had the guts to wake up early morning to watch Tottenham games as well. Big part of me right now, the staying up late thing.

So, later part of the year I knuckled down and studied, while the occasional after school lunch and pingpong at Ben's place. Then one fine afternoon, I played basketball with a couple of friends. That Friday afternoon was the day I met.. well, Potato. Nuff said. That potato was really cool, we shared quite a lot in common, and we talked quite a bit. I don't really wanna go into details but that Potato changed me. And will always be an important part of me.

That was also the year I became really self conscious, not really that vain but I started to take note of myself more than I used to before. I cared about what others thought about me and I made sure it was good things they were saying. Whenever I hear someone badmouthing me in any way, I get really upset. I try to change the way I am, to become someone better. Someone who was of help to people, someone friends could count on. And even at this moment I really try to be a good guy, in the meantime not forgetting to be myself.

Vanessa taught me one thing, I remember. That, I should stop living for other people. This is me, this is my life. I should enjoy it. Well, till now I still believe in helping whenever I can but well, maybe because of her I've learnt to enjoy life a bit more. Life is short, we should do whatever we want. As long as its morally correct and wont get you in too much of deep shit.

During the holidays I vowed I'd make it exciting and productive. Well, no doubt, I had a lot of fun. Though I felt it could have been better in some aspects. I didnt just lie around all day waiting for things to happen. I made it happen. Such as doing things I've never did before, because that's when you actually gain knowledge. So one day I tried eating a Double McSpicy. No doubt I gained knowledge, knowledge to never do that again. Unless I felt like doing so.

During the holidays, things happened as well. My maid went back to her homeland, leaving my family without a maid since years. We struggled to cope at first, had plenty of arguments here and there. But things seemed to have settled down right now. I must admit, I was really emotional when my maid left. I was on my way to meet Haolun when I teared on the train, I recieved a phone call from my dad scolding me because I forgot to take keys. That I had to open the door, not just ring a bell and someone would open it for me. I teared. It was a moment of realization, that, I have to start being independent. Start doing things on my own. I'm not the spoiled little brat I once was. I'm my own man. I'm capable of doing it myself, why bother people and get help for things I can do myself?

Well, life without a maid has settled down for me and family. We're far more relaxed now. There might have been much more I haven't mentioned in this post, but overall, I really enjoyed 2010. Thanks to all of you who I have met, who made this year an extremely fruitful and enjoyable year for me. It shaped me and I probably won't forget it. Cheers to a better 2011 everyone!

-Renald